Don’t call me negative, call Ralphs.

Ralphs Private Selection 1001 Chocolate Chip Cake. Described as:

Rich white cake with chocolate chips and chocolate icing

Have you ever had white cake with melt in your mouth chocolate flakes or specks before? So good!

This wasn’t that.

drawing of chocolate mousse cake

I don’t like writing negative reviews. I prefer to ignore bad things, just as I do in real life. Hope it goes away.  But this cake annoyed me.

I looked at it long and hard in the store. Store bought cakes are the worst, right? But Ralphs sells half cakes, and in the one cut in half I could see the chocolate chips inside were very small, really chocolate flakes, so it got my hopes up. And I really prefer white cake to yellow. And I liked the little humorous title, “1001 chips”.


It had way too many bitty chocolate chips all over the icing on top, which were tasteless and wouldn’t melt in the desert, let alone your mouth. They felt like pebbles against your lips. The icing was a sugar icing, gritty and fake tasting. And the white cake that looked so hopeful in the open sample, was dry and bland in real life.

Can anyone point me in the direction of how to do a cake like this right? Or even better,  tell Ralphs. They owe me a new cake.


Illustration from Nestle’s Perfect Endings Chocolate Dessert and Beverage Cook Book, vintage cookbook.